Aunt Mary Ann

The CMML Missionary Guest House

Tonight I get to sit at a very cool desk, in a beautiful room in a castle, listen to the crickets and write. For those of you who don't know, I'm a CMML missionary (Christian Missions in Many Lands) and they have a guest house in South Jersey. I've never actually stayed overnight, since my parents' house is only about an hour away, but I really could get used to this! ;)

What do I know of Holy?

"What do I know of You who spoke me into motion? Where have I even stood but the shore along your ocean? Are you fire? Are you fury? Are you sacred? Are you beautiful? Lord, what do I know of holy?"

My Aunt Mary Ann asked me to sing this song at her funeral. Mary Ann was my grandma-substitute-aunt. She lived 19 hours away, yet visited our house in NJ a lot, never missing a birthday and Christmas gifts and phone calls. As I grew up, I enjoyed going to visit her and staying in her 5-star bed & breakfast house and learning about my Upper (pronounced You-per) roots. We even talked about her visiting Ecuador sometime. Well, Mary Ann got an aggressive cancer that brought her to heaven quicker than any of us wanted. We were able to visit her for a few days during my first week home and we chatted and hung out. She didn't let us know how much pain she was in or how uncomfortable she must have been being fed by tubes. Two weeks later, Aunt Mary Ann left for her home in heaven and left behind a detailed funeral plan. As I practiced "What do I know of Holy" I thought it was a pretty weird funeral song. It's pretty, Mary Ann, but we want to think of you and Jesus and heaven right now. But then it hit me. What do I know of holy? Me. Here. Nada. What did Mary Ann know of holy when she picked out this song? Nothing. What does she know of holy NOW? Oh so much. That very minute I was singing those words, asking God what He is like, what can I understand of who He is, Mary Ann was actively in His Presence. She had no more questions. She has no more questions. She's not waiting for me to join her, and when I do, she will have just gotten started worshipping her God.

So my first at-home post is about my Aunt Mary Ann and Jesus bringing her to heaven. I miss her a lot. But I know I will see her soon. I'm so thankful that God waited until I was in the US to take her. Thank You, Lord! 

Time in the UP (Upper Peninsula of Michigan)